Vegas is fun. So fun. This is just what I needed.

No nagging.

Today I went to Mandalay Bay and went to the Shark Reef. I got sort of freaked out. That's normal, right? Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving!

It is now the Friday after Thanksgiving. Hellllllo sweet deals! Hello Xbox 360. Hello every store being open!

Things are good.

Today was horrible. Someone deleted my damn folder in TV. I hate starting from scratch. I hate everything.
I hate how everyone picked on me, piles things on top like I'm a damn dumpster.


I can't wait until I'm out of here. At least for a few days.

Just for a few days. That's all I really want.

I want to keep my head on straight. I want to live a life that I like. I want to last.
I want to be durable.

But then I think about forever and get too scared to do things right.
whatamidoing?

I want to be infinite. I want the feeling of being infinite. Why can the universe be infinite but we can't?

ihatethis.

I need light. The darkness has been hunting me down for days, weeks, months even.

I wish there was a God.

I'm losing inspiration. Inspiration, I'm losing it. I'm losing my mind.

I'm sitting here. I'm yawning. I'm tired. I'm awake and I need sleep.

Sleep. Yeah, that.

I'll say the words that mean everything, only if you do the things that mean nothing.

I feel accomplished. I feel determined. I feel accepted. I feel my heart beating. I feel real.

I like this feeling.

I've come to my turning point.

hap·pi·ness
noun
:a state of well-being and contentment

I'm never content, because there's always something better to do. There's always room for improvement.

Today I found out that I'm going to be published in a book for an essay I wrote. Maybe thousands of people are going to read what I wrote and agree with me. This makes me smile, but I am not content because while proofreading, I kept on thinking "What was I thinking?" What am I thinking?

This is when I want to shoot Merriam-Webster and redefine happiness.